Thursday, January 31, 2008

week end

this is what nf and I did friday:

and as a family on saturday night:

looks like more of the same, right? well kinda. the saturday night show was better (and i thought the friday night show rocked) the only downside for me was standing in a 1'x1' space back stage on account of belle being a minor.

being a rather large fly on the wall has its advantages, though. like, i learned that those who perform need to be told what city they are in

(that's will daily of boston on stage)

and there are vital tools required for a successful show

...and hydration is a must

these are my two favorites. i really love michael's guitar straps.

but really, the best part of the night was watching my 14 year old marvel at being under age in a 21 and over nightclub (she was back stage where it's legal) hanging out in the green room conversing with bona-fide rock stars and finally, finally meeting uncle mike.

to all of you that I offered tickets too-- you missed two great shows and I missed you!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Good things this week

i'm not a big shopper mostly because i hate being a consumer but sometimes you just got to break down, swallow your principles and get that new "thing" you think you gotta have. this week i helped the local economy a bit more than ususal and spent some of that money sitting in the bank.

so heres the first purchase i made: get'm get'm guitar strap. can anyone tell me what i like about this?

second guitar related purchase. shubb capo bar. i had no idea! i can't believe it took me so long to get one. anyways, i plan to make many beautiful hours of music with this little piece of metal and rubber.

last Friday I finally dragged my ass to the eye doctor and look what i got. i feel pretty, oh so pretty.

and this was my little project tuesday night. henna. what a friggin mess. i smelled like a barn for two days,even with my hair up in a bun. but this morning i let it down and this is what i got. wow! thank you chandelle for talking me into it. it feels great. it looks great and i only smell like a chicken coop now.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008


More and more there is this animal
Looking out through my eyes
At all the traffic on the road to nowhere
At all the shiny stuff around to buy
At all the wires in the air
At all the people shopping
For the same blank stare
At america the drastic
That isolated geographic
That's become infested with millionaires

When you grow up surrounded
By willful ignorance
You have to believe
Mercy has its own country
And that it's round and borderless
And then you have to grow wings
And rise above it all
Like there
Where that hawk is circling
Above that strip mall

More and more there is this animal
Looking out through my eyes
Seeing that animals only
take from this world
What they need to survive
But she is prowling through all
the religions of men

Seeing that time and time and time again
Their gods have made them
Special and above
Nature's law
And the respect thereof

And I think when you grow up surrounded
By willful ignorance
You have to believe that mercy
has its own country
And that it's round and borderless
And then you just grow wings
And rise above it all
Like there where that hawk is circling
Above that strip mall

Ask any eco-system
Harm here is harm there
And there and there
And aggression begets aggression
It's a very simple lesson
That long preceded any king of heaven
And there's this brutal imperial power
That my passport says I represent
But it will never represent
where my heart lives
Only vaguely where it went

Cause I know when you grow up surrounded
By willful ignorance
You learn that mercy has its own country
And that it's round and borderless
And then you just grow wings
And rise above it all
Like there
Where that hawk is circling
Above that strip mall

-Ani Difranco

Monday, January 21, 2008

it sounds so good to me...

driving my little red jetta
the sunroof open
90 miles per hour
on the toll road to mountains where the air is so...clean

away from the city
along the winding roads
up to where i would experience one of the most important times of my life.
it was a turning point.
finally able to experience a childhood
a youth
becoming independent
of him.

it's so damn powerful...the music

there i am again
driving around the city...the music is so loud
and i'm barely aware of anything
except how good the sunshine feels on my face.

it's so damn powerful...the music

i'm there now.
i'm twenty something and single...enjoying a life I created.
feeling beautiful and strong.

i could do anything then.

...i still can.

Thursday, January 10, 2008


After a year or so of blogging, I am just now starting to notice the competition going on between bloggers. (too bad, the honeymoon has ended)

Individuals that have left the LDS church or on their way out are doing their best to prove how right they were to leave by telling the rest of us how shitty the church is because it lied about some piece of history or how it hides the real truth about its doctrines.

(last time i checked, the church is not human and it cannot lie)

and the TBM's are doing their best to prove that what they believe is true, (a la numerous GA quotes and scriptures) and "it's the best way to true happiness" and" if you only did____you'd know."

(last time i checked on this one, you can't prove spiritual knowledge)

sorry to say this but....

who gives a shit who's right? ONLY YOU DO!

Instead of trying to compete with each other and prove you are more right, take a step back and see that you can both be right. One can believe that Joseph Smith saw God and that families can be eternal via temple sealings and that the LDS church is the only true and living church on the planet but what you believe doesn't make the next guy believe and it doesn't make it true for him because you have the "truth."

And one can have issues with the LDS church. You can hate its doctrines, disbelieve its history and feel that you were lied to, duped and tricked. You can be hurt and angry but it doesn't mean that I was lied too or I was duped. It doesn't make me a fool fool or blind because I am not angry.

That kind of thinking is condescending, rude, thoughtless, passive/aggressive and ultimately unproductive for both sides. Nobody wins, nobody learns and you don't make friends trying to out- do each other.

So here's the real gist of what I am getting at: People on both sides are way more concerned with an individuals output--what was said on the blog, what decisions were made, how she handled this or that-- and way less concerned with the human emotional element that is the cause to the actions.

It's time to take a step back folks. The people on the blogs are just that-- people. and they have a variety of reasons for staying, leaving, doubting and believing. Argument is good, disagreement is good but for everyone's sake, see them as people living a life, just as and often times, more difficult than the life you are living.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

i need a name

I have matching spots on my ears.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Share With Me

...along with all of the wishes for a happy new year being tossed about freely, i want to add that i hope each of you reading this are able to:

take a minute to call an old friend
do at least 5 random acts of kindness (preferably outside of the ward/church)
take a trip or vacation to a destination of your choice.
complete at least 1 of your new years resolutions.
make your rent/mortgage with ease.

i'm not one to make resolutions or set goals (i forget within minutes what I set out to do) but these seem like nice things to aspire to in the coming year.

tell me what you would like to see on this list.

What is your footprint?

Ecological Footprint Quiz by Redefining Progress